This time

At this time
I try to to find
his state of mind
that wasn't kind t
To this
sad , lonely boy
I mean i understand his stance
from one hoping for a second chance
I cannot hope to romance
the notion
that this is all his fault
In his eyes i could be a parasite
that hopes to blight
his standing
with his family
with my demanding
com hither stare
That entrances
and perchance
smiles and friendly conversation
Something he never could achieve
and i believe
he let me in
Thinking
I would play the victim
one he could pity
who fell through the system
so he could feel
charitable
but i dissed him when
through subtle implies
i improvised
and
under the guise
that i could compromise
and yet without any lies
i
completely mislead him
No small feat
to deceive
without actual deceit
but i believe
that beat
of the metaphorical drum
cause a hum
of unknown repercussions
that small stick of dynamite
proves to be my kryptonite
i realize as i wate for the #12 bus
and i hush
so i can think
Now that i messed up
what.. do.. i .. do
Next
but i di
gres
because right now
my main concern
is
that.. i .. stay
blessed